Sunday 18 May 2008

Ask Elvis.....

So I go to play at my nieces naming ceremony, they asked me to play the piece I wrote and played at their wedding, this is my sisters and brother in laws.
I'm more than happy, there's a break in the ceremony "and now Nick will play...yada yada yada..... Sister in law cries, she always does when I play that piece, all is great.

The ceremony finished we all enjoy the food, drink and company for the next few hours.

We decide it's time to go and I get my guitar ready to pt back in it's case and go home.
"Oh no, please play us a tune before you go Nick" I refuse politely and continue to get my guitar ready to go. It may sound a little rude on my part but I've been here before. I'm not that kind of player. I've been playing for over 30 years, I am pretty good but I don't know a lot of cover songs and the one I do know, no one has heard of them. Jeff Buckley's "So Real" goes down great in a small music bar but at a party with wine filled guests it just annoys people. What they want is Beatles, Oasis songs they know.
However I make the decision to try and change this around. I get out my guitar, retune it and Play "That Woman". It's nice and loud and should be enough to please and get me the hell out. 
I should have known, I'm 4 seconds in and already people are talking over it. Ok, you say, it's a party you say, people talk at parties. BUT YOU ASKED ME TO PLAY!

I carry on after around a minute of intro and manage to get through the song. 
"Play that one I like" " You know the one" Oh fuck, here we go.....
I do my best honest, I play some of my tunes. They're not as loud as That Woman and I'm losing the crowd as they return to their chatting. I stopped when a woman walking past me thought it would be fun to strum her log nails across the strings as I was playing. 
Fuck it, I thought and that was it. I stopped. 
Moans and groans and me explaining that I don't know the songs they want to here. I was being as upbeat and polite as I could but for fucks sake!
Drunk strummy guitar woman had the fucking nerve to come up to me, telling me that she loved my voice and guitar playing and would I play "Love me do" by Elvis as her dad was dying and it was his favourite song. I did try to explain that it was The Beatles but the bitch wouldn't have it.
I've learned my lesson now, I just play at gigs.

I think she meant "Love me tender" but I can't play that either.....

4 comments:

Angel said...

You have me in tears I'm laughing so hard. A better picture of how it goes could not have been painted. People just don't understand. Bless their hearts...

Anonymous said...

You should have punched that woman in the neck.

Tina bo bina said...

Hey Nicky, tis Tina, I miss you, just thought I'd pop in to say hello! I think I'll be spending more time here than anywhere anymore. I miss the gang though. :(

Hope you're doing well, come check me out and drop a line or two! ;)

charles olsen said...

yep... been there!